Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Preparing for life after work. RRSPs, RRIFs, TFSAs, annuities and meeting future financial and psychological needs.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by SkaSka »

kcowan wrote:
SQRT wrote:Not sure of the history here. But looks like it is bad form to respond to Blonde's outrageous posts?
Consider the following guiding principles:

1) Money Talks.

2) Don't Trust Anyone.

3) The Need to be in the Loop...Insider Info.

4) Contribute Minimum and Withdraw Maximum Plus.

5) Look After #1.
by blonde
Sun Feb 27, 2005 3:42 pm
Many of her posts make sense when you consider her principles. But she seldom engages.
I've been trying to figure out Blonde since I first got here. While I still don't completely get Blonde, I share the belief that many of her posts do make sense if you consider her principles. I actually enjoy and look forward to Blonde's comments. I look forward to one day getting an "atta boy" directly from Blonde!

More related on topic, I've been really enjoying reading everyone's responses - very insightful and lots to contemplate!
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by SQRT »

SkaSka wrote:
I've been trying to figure out Blonde since I first got here. While I still don't completely get Blonde, I share the belief that many of her posts do make sense if you consider her principles. I actually enjoy and look forward to Blonde's comments
Yes, I can see how that might be the case once you dismiss his/her warped paranoid view of the world. A little escapism in an otherwise pretty serious site.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by ModeratorW »

Please get back on topic. Thank you.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Bylo Selhi »

This post tells you everything you need to know about the value Blonde provides to this forum:
On 15 Jan 2011 adrian2 wrote:
brucecohen wrote:
blonde wrote:At the risk of repeating myself...
Do not be surprised to learn that there are many Bigger and Better investment instruments than the RRSP.
At the risk of repeating myself, this is probably the 100th time you've made this claim without providing any information to support it. Or is it the 500th?
Blonde's current posts total: 2646.
I'd say 500th time is closer to reality. :)
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Inquisitive »

Tedster writes:
my mother became ill and I had to choose between looking after her or chasing work. Chose Mom.
A kind choice. It looks as if it paid off for you as well as her. I tried to do both (keep my job, care for my ultimately very ill mum) and I couldn't do either job properly; paid with my own health a bit and some guilt. But that's a theme for a different thread.

Or maybe not. Losing both the ability to work and someone who needed my help made for a difficult transition to retirement as I had enjoyed being very busy, in demand at work and needed by my parent. Suddenly nobody much needed me, which was disconcerting. Gardening is good, especially in a drought, as the plants and the bees need me. :)
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by tedster »

Inq wrote
Losing both the ability to work and someone who needed my help made for a difficult transition to retirement as I had enjoyed being very busy, in demand at work and needed by my parent. Suddenly nobody much needed me, which was disconcerting.
I experienced the same thing. However, in my case my work was very stressful and I did not mind losing it as I had enough money. To stay on topic, I would say that going on retirement with sufficient funds works provided one does not self identify with one's work. :)
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Flaccidsteele »

tedster wrote:I would say that going on retirement with sufficient funds works provided one does not self identify with one's work. :)
I agree with this.

Only speaking for myself, $ from work was always a means to an end. I didn't care about 'feeling needed', working for a 'Fortune 500' company, job security, staying busy or whatnot. Unfortunately most of my working peers believe that they are more important than they really are. Even more unfortunate, others use work to keep their souls occupied as they have no interest/ability for self-direction/introspection.

I used the ideas behind the article on regrets of the dying and happiness, to guide my path. Thus far, the wisdom of elders appear to be spot on.

PS: $ from work was a means to an end, namely, to be able to stop working. And $ in and of itself was a means to an end, namely, to be able to follow the ideas behind 'regrets' and 'happiness'.

"Money, any fool can have."
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by cannew »

Start getting rid of all the items you've collected over the years and don't add to the pile. If at some point you decide to down size, getting rid of items your kids don't want or furniture you've loved, will be one of the hardest parts of moving.

Just went through this and I agree with the statement "If you haven't looked at something or used for longer than a year, than consider getting rid of it".
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by like_to_retire »

Interesting thread for sure. I wonder if we have to consider that FWF may not be a representable sample of the general public (who are mostly terrible with respect to their finances from my observations). FWF members here are a special breed, and as expected from the retired responders so far, that finances in retirement aren't an issue. I might not recommend this thread as a representative touchstone.

I've been retired for eight years now, and like most responders so far, finances aren't an issue. I was well prepared before retiring after 35 years of career pressure, and my only concern with finances so far are the machinations that I examine with respect to OAS (evil by FWF definition). Supposedly, I should be grateful to pay my recovery tax. I don't post on that subject any more. Anyway, I do observe that my life-long penny pinching ways are somewhat difficult to overcome in retirement. As a result of my obsession with saving, I generate much more income than I can spend. The fact is, I just don't really want much, and while I spend a bit too much on my kids and grandkids, I wish I didn't still feel so quilty when I indulge myself now and then. I'm working on that.

For myself, it took at least two years of retirement before my engine slowed down and I felt comfortable being retired. Only one responder so far has brought up the subject of guilt. In the initial phase of retirement, I had a real underlying feeling of guilt when I got up every day. It was the fact that everyone else had to go to work and fight the good fight, while I lazed around doing whatever I pleased - not that I didn't enjoy doing that, and still do. I would exit my house in the morning and everyone's car was gone from their driveway, and I knew they had gone to work, but not me. The only emotion I can attach to how I felt was guilt that I was now being paid to stay home and do whatever I wanted. It took several years to get past that feeling and to feel good about being retired - to begin to think that I deserved to not have to work every day. Originally, people got old and just couldn't work any more because their bodies were worn out, so they had to stop, and then within the next few years they died. Today, it's not unusual to retire and live for another thirty or forty years. Weird.

I find it's so easy to fill the available time, I can't imagine how I ever found the time to work for eight hours (plus). I remember working friends who would say to me, "what do you do all day?" My response is always, "whatever I want".

I guess health is one of my important issues now. Not that I have any problems, but I can see that it's very important to keep in the best shape possible. Exercising and eating right are at the front of my mind all the time. I use to be able to abuse the shit out of my body, but now I have to be constantly vigilant. I use to go to bed and sleep for eight or nine hours solid. Now I'm up once or twice a night having to pea. What a bust.

I forget things now that I use to remember. I bang my arm against a counter and have a ridiculously huge black and blue bruise that lasts for days that simply wouldn't have happened twenty years ago. Cuts and bruises just don't heal as fast.

I work hard for a few hours and I'm tired, where I use to be able to go for an entire day and not think about it.

Another change is the awareness of a shortened time left to live. When I replace a fence or a roof now, I reflect on how long I feel I have to live. Do I really need a 35 year shingle if I'm likely to be dead? It's sobering.

I don't know if anyone can really take anything away from this thread, as the vagaries of each situation are so different, but if you have enough money, and your health is good, retirement is a pure joy.

ltr
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by kcowan »

I was buying something the other day and the salesman said it had a lifetime guarantee. I asked "Whose lifetime?" We both had a laugh! :rofl:
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Flaccidsteele »

like_to_retire wrote:I forget things now that I use to remember. I bang my arm against a counter and have a ridiculously huge black and blue bruise that lasts for days that simply wouldn't have happened twenty years ago. Cuts and bruises just don't heal as fast.

I work hard for a few hours and I'm tired, where I use to be able to go for an entire day and not think about it.
I hear this a lot. And I must say that this is one of the more unfortunate things about aging.
like_to_retire wrote:Another change is the awareness of a shortened time left to live. When I replace a fence or a roof now, I reflect on how long I feel I have to live. Do I really need a 35 year shingle if I'm likely to be dead? It's sobering.
The following is from The Great Philosophers 10: Martin Heidegger:
We know it in theory, of course, but we aren’t day-to-day properly in touch with the sheer mystery of existence, the mystery of what Heidegger called ‘das Sein’ or ‘Being’. Much of his philosophy is devoted to trying to wake us up to the strangeness of existing on a planet spinning in an otherwise seemingly silent, alien and uninhabited universe.

...

For Heidegger, the modern world is an infernal machine dedicated to distracting us from the basic wondrous nature of Being. It constantly pulls towards practical tasks, it overwhelms us with information, it kills silence, it doesn’t want to leave us alone – partly because realizing the mystery of Being has its frightening dimensions. Doing so, we may be seized by fear (‘Angst’) as we become conscious that everything that had seemed rooted, necessary and oh-so-important may be contingent, senseless and without true purpose. We may ask why we have this job rather than that one, are in a relationship with one person rather than another, are alive when we might so easily be dead… Much of daily life is designed to keep these odd, unnerving but crucial questions at bay.

...

We look at the world through the prism of our own narrow interests. Our professional needs colour what we pay attention to and bother with. We treat others and nature as means and not as ends.

But occasionally (and again walks in the country are particularly conducive to this realisation), we may be able to step outside our narrow orbit and take a more generous view of our connection with the rest of existence. We may sense what Heidegger termed the Unity of Being, noticing – in a way we hadn’t previously – that we, and that ladybird on the bark, and that rock, and that cloud are all in existence right now and are fundamentally united by the basic fact of Being.

...

Much about us isn’t of course very free. We are – in Heidegger’s unusual formulation – ‘thrown into the world’ at the start of our lives: thrown into a particular and narrow social milieu, surrounded by rigid attitudes, archaic prejudices and practical necessities not of our own making.

The philosopher wants to help us to overcome this ‘Thrownness’ (this ‘Geworfenheit’) by understanding its multiple features. We should aim to grasp our psychological, social and professional provincialism – and then rise above it to a more universal perspective.

In so doing, we’ll make the classic Heideggerian journey away from ‘Uneigentlichkeit’ to ‘Eigentlichkeit’ (from Inauthenticity to Authenticity). We will, in essence, start to live for ourselves.

And yet most of the time, for Heidegger, we fail dismally at this task. We merely surrender to a socialised, superficial mode of being he called ‘they-self’ (as opposed to ‘our-selves’). We follow The Chatter (‘das Gerede’)

...

Most of the time, without quite meaning to, we treat people as what Heidegger terms ‘Equipment’: ‘das Zeug’ – as if they were tools, rather than Beings in Themselves.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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like_to_retire wrote:I forget things now that I use to remember. I bang my arm against a counter and have a ridiculously huge black and blue bruise that lasts for days that simply wouldn't have happened twenty years ago. Cuts and bruises just don't heal as fast.

I work hard for a few hours and I'm tired
I believe that there are some things that physicians simply blame on aging, when they are in fact something else. Is it possible that you have high blood glucose? After a dinner with lots of carbs (such as potatoes or pasta) do you fall asleep in a sofa in front of the television?
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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like_to_retire wrote: I find it's so easy to fill the available time, I can't imagine how I ever found the time to work for eight hours (plus). I remember working friends who would say to me, "what do you do all day?" My response is always, "whatever I want".
Thanks for relating your thoughts on this subject, ltr. I too remember the above high lighted question from several friends and acquaintances. I didn't have a clever answer. All I would say was that I had no trouble keeping busy. I suspect most simply thought of me as lazy and without purpose. Folks don't ask anymore.

For me, the one great casualty of early retirement has been the relationships that I had during my working years with my business contacts. WE don't have that common thread to bind us. Those folks simply don't contact me anymore, because quite frankly, I think they're stumped as to what to talk about. I'm not up-to-date on that world anymore and more importantly, I have no real interest either. Almost all of my close relationships outside of family have been forged in the post retirement period now as different interests and activities have led to new relationships. There is a certain comfort in that knowing that you could pick up and move and rebuild. There's always new things to do and new people to meet!
"On what principle is it, that when we see nothing but improvement behind us, we are to expect nothing but deterioration before us?"
Thomas Babington Macaulay in 1830
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by SQRT »

scomac wrote:
For me, the one great casualty of early retirement has been the relationships that I had during my working years with my business contacts. WE don't have that common thread to bind us. Those folks simply don't contact me anymore, because quite frankly, I think they're stumped as to what to talk about. I'm not up-to-date on that world anymore and more importantly, I have no real interest either. Almost all of my close relationships outside of family have been forged in the post retirement period now as different interests and activities have led to new relationships. There is a certain comfort in that knowing that you could pick up and move and rebuild. There's always new things to do and new people to meet!
This has been my experience as well. Most of our current close friends are new since retirement. Met most of them on biking trips run by the likes of Butterfield & Robinson. I don't have hardly any contact with old work associates. Like you said, what would we talk about other than "old times" that most of us want to forget?
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by kcowan »

We had a couple of events that emphasized the changing relationships. We went to dinner and a play with a UBC professor and the retired Golf Club Manager from Bend OR. We met them both separately in their homes south of Puerto Vallarta.

Then last night a good friend of my wife got married. She has been a regular visitor to PV and invited many of her friends from there. The ones from southern California and Calgary we only knew vaguely. We drove a couple who we met as owners in PV but who now own a place in our West Van neighborhood.

The only people we knew at the time of our retirement were the lady who got married and one of her friends.

(I often tell people that I am a private portfolio manager. That often ends further discussion about avocation.)
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by scomac »

kcowan wrote:
(I often tell people that I am a private portfolio manager. That often ends further discussion about avocation.)
I like this Keith. Can I borrow it?

I didn't describe my pastime as such, but when a golfing buddy pointedly asked how I made money, I said that I had a few investments. That ended the discussion right then and there. You would think that someone might be curious, but these sorts of disclosures seem to generate a response that you might expect if you revealed that your stage name was Walter White. :lol:
"On what principle is it, that when we see nothing but improvement behind us, we are to expect nothing but deterioration before us?"
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by kcowan »

scomac wrote:
kcowan wrote:
(I often tell people that I am a private portfolio manager. That often ends further discussion about avocation.)
I like this Keith. Can I borrow it?
Absolutely. Because you are!

Sometimes persistent people will ask what I used to do. I say I spent my working life convincing people to do things they did not want to do naturally. (Sales and management, then consulting.)
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by SkaSka »

Flaccidsteele wrote:
tedster wrote:I would say that going on retirement with sufficient funds works provided one does not self identify with one's work. :)
I agree with this.

Only speaking for myself, $ from work was always a means to an end. I didn't care about 'feeling needed', working for a 'Fortune 500' company, job security, staying busy or whatnot. Unfortunately most of my working peers believe that they are more important than they really are. Even more unfortunate, others use work to keep their souls occupied as they have no interest/ability for self-direction/introspection.

I used the ideas behind the article on regrets of the dying and happiness, to guide my path. Thus far, the wisdom of elders appear to be spot on.

PS: $ from work was a means to an end, namely, to be able to stop working. And $ in and of itself was a means to an end, namely, to be able to follow the ideas behind 'regrets' and 'happiness'.

"Money, any fool can have."
Flaccidsteele, I often read your posts and can't help but think how eerily similar our philosophy/approach to life are. I too merely see my job and the money it produces as a means to end. Could care less about all the things you mentioned about employment too. Get the money to quit the rat race and then use the money to minimize regrets and maximize happiness.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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I have really been enjoying this thread as I prepare myself for early retirement. Lots of great perspectives here on life and living.

Martin Heidegger! Wow . . . haven't heard much about him since university days. It seems a real luxury to have had the time and money to have studied the arts, as I did.

I spoke to my wife recently about retiring early and she said, "Go for it!" But when I started making inquiries and actually coming closer to making a real move, she began to change her mind. She said that I should retire when it would be possible for us BOTH to retire together. In other words, she didn't like the idea that she would have to go on working full-time in order for us to have the necessary security for me to do it. She also said that she was afraid of what her parents would think: they would NOT understand the concept of living off investment income; they would be afraid of the risks I was taking; they would resent that I was becoming dependent on their daughter when I should be out there working hard like everybody else. They would think I was irresponsible, what with kids and all.

I started to think that, yeah, a lot of people would not understand and would think of me as lazy and irresponsible. I respect my wife's feelings, cause I know she doesn't much like her job, either. I also respect the feelings of her parents: they are the norm here.

But this is JAPAN, where life is work and the vast majority are afraid of the stock market.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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Living off investments and pension in retirement? Seems pretty obvious to me. I am surprised people don't understand this better? Seems like the "golden grail" to me?
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by kcowan »

JaydoubleU wrote:But this is JAPAN, where life is work and the vast majority are afraid of the stock market.
My Mom was shocked when I elected to go into sales after getting a Masters of Process Engineering degree. I said: "That is where the money is!"

You should not live your life to satisfy anyone else. "To thine own self be true" had an element of truth in it...
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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SQRT wrote:Living off investments and pension in retirement? Seems pretty obvious to me. I am surprised people don't understand this better? Seems like the "golden grail" to me?
I think the issue that folks have with early retirees is that they know the retiree isn't getting OAS/CPP. They also know that taking a workplace pension early results in substantially reduced benefits. So, if you aren't a gov't employee, how do you do it?

The golfing buddy that asked me the pointed question is 60. He has no pension. He is currently between contracts working in the IT field. Another mutual friend asked him why he wasn't taking CPP early particularly in light of the fact he isn't working and his response was that he couldn't afford to take it early. He and his spouse would need the full gov't entitlements in order to retire. These are good people, but they just never prioritized saving for retirement. These folks do not lead a lavish lifestyle. They have never had the benefit of strong workplace pension plans and as with so many others, what savings they have managed over the years ended up being directed towards other priorities that seemed more pressing at the time.
"On what principle is it, that when we see nothing but improvement behind us, we are to expect nothing but deterioration before us?"
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Bylo Selhi »

scomac wrote:The golfing buddy that asked me the pointed question is 60. He has no pension. He is currently between contracts working in the IT field. Another mutual friend asked him why he wasn't taking CPP early particularly in light of the fact he isn't working and his response was that he couldn't afford to take it early. He and his spouse would need the full gov't entitlements in order to retire. These are good people, but they just never prioritized saving for retirement. These folks do not lead a lavish lifestyle. They have never had the benefit of strong workplace pension plans and as with so many others, what savings they have managed over the years ended up being directed towards other priorities that seemed more pressing at the time.
Sounds like the demographic for whom the proposed ORPP is intended.
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

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Bylo Selhi wrote: Sounds like the demographic for whom the proposed ORPP is intended.
Agreed. Unfortunately, they won't be the beneficiaries. However, these folks are not alone and I suspect that we'll see more and more of this as time goes on due to the preponderance of contract work.
"On what principle is it, that when we see nothing but improvement behind us, we are to expect nothing but deterioration before us?"
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Re: Question for those who have been retired for awhile

Post by Bylo Selhi »

scomac wrote:Unfortunately, they won't be the beneficiaries.
The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago, the second best time is now... Chinese proverb

Change has to start somewhere. The kids today who, like your golfing buddies, don't think they need to save for retirement, will be the beneficiaries 20 or 30 years from now when it's their turn to retire (early.)

(Whether they'll remember us, let alone be grateful to our generation for creating such a plan is quite another matter ;))
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